Confessions of a Ragamuffin

           I believe this to be the most personal/real blog I have written yet, maybe even written period… Why? Because in this blog I must, for the sake of being honest in my relationship with Christ, admit that I have possessed some very wrong philosophies, have expressed them on this blog wrongly, and now I hope to apologize to you for them. So here are my apologies, some revisions I have chosen to make, and some thoughts about what I do believe backed up by Bible references and the words of some men that I have been greatly blessed by.

          First I want you to know that I have not been writing much on this site over the past few months because I have felt the utmost guilt about certain elements within my lifestyle. I am referring to issues relating to my personal life and the evolution of certain beliefs that I have since questioned and prayed through. You see, I wrote this “Mission Statement” a while back (its posted on my “My Mission” page to this blog-site), in which I describe my eagerness and conviction to serve the Lord. No that is not something I have rethought, but the way I see myself serving God has drastically changed. Originally I took a “me vs. the world” and “me vs. Satan” approach, stoically attempting to vainly impress the readers with my eagerness to serve the Lord and my passion and verve to do it with words and references that made me look and feel good about myself. But somewhere in there I forgot that I should have a “He vs. Satan and the world” mindset, and that I am merely the tool He has constructed to aid in this already won war. I must also say that in a few of my blogs (which I have since removed or re-edited) I also seemed to take this approach. Why was this wrong? Because the focus was not on God, it was on me. Not only that, but I deified certain men in the Bible, instead of giving glory to the God who lovingly decided to use them. So I apologize from the bottom of my heart for that shamble of a mission statement and those naïve and prideful comments made in a few of my blogs.

          SO, I updated my mission statement, and the two paragraphs below will replace it in the very near future. I hope it blesses you in the ways that God has blessed me in teaching me these lessons. We serve an awesome God, that possesses and awesome love for us.

          I am a man. No, not a child unaccountable for my actions, a man- flawed through and through, with nothing within me strong enough to hold myself up- accountable for every thought, every word, and every deed. My sins include, but are not limited to the following… I drink to the point of drunkenness. I curse as though the glorious name of Jesus has never been uttered from my lips. I have had premarital sex, and I fornicate daily in my thoughts. I have looked upon pornography more eagerly at times than my Bible. I have hated my fellow man in the depths of my heart. I have stolen in my youth. I have dishonored and disrespected my parents, and still struggle not doing so when under control of my flesh. I have smoked cigarettes, pipes, and cigars when I knew I shouldn’t. I have been a stumbling block to many of my fellow men on a myriad of occasions. I have failed to preach, give, and support those in need, when faced with many opportunities to do so. And I have eaten to the point of gluttony, defiling the temple of the Holy Spirit with every bite of food I took. All these sins I have committed, and all these sins follow me still. But I testify to you this day that I am no worse than any other man of faith! I am no worse than any well known evangelist, or any better than the whore on the street corner selling her God given purity for a dime. I am a man, flawed through and through, but made perfect through the blood of the only perfect man- a man not guilty of any of my sins listed above- a man named Jesus. I am working, by His grace, on the sins listed above that still test me, so that my house may be in order, and I appreciate your prayers in this process.

          We all share a common bond of weakness, for we are but dust, and all of us that struggle and act on the most common of temptations are equals in our undeservingness of hell and of fire, and of separation from the Father. But we have a much greater bond still, one which no man may cut or disassemble with any amount of words or actions, one which extends into eternity. We are all united under the umbrella of love from our Father. He, through His perfect grace, mercy and love has given us a way out! He has loved us constantly and immensely even though not a one of us deserves it. He has taken our burden upon His own back, and has suffered the penalty of sin for us. He has pursued us, blessed us, healed us, comforted us, disciplined us, rescued us, nourished us, and has given His beautiful son Jesus as a sacrifice for us! These truths make God, God, while my sins make me, not God. I recognize this, and that in all of this, He has been faithful and just to forgive me of my sins, and has taught me the most simple yet profound of truths. He has taught me that He will love me no matter where I am, what I am doing, and even if I am not reaching that “perfect Christian life” that we all aspire to, but no man truly reaches. He will meet me in the margins! No this is not an excuse for laziness, but it is an incentive for holiness! I pray I will strive for truth in a world of lies and that I will be a blessing to anyone that needs an answer, or is curious about the truth that is in me.

Oswald Chambers says this in My Utmost For His Highest- December 2nd

           “It is a trap to presume that God wants to make us perfect specimens of what He can do— God’s purpose is to make us one with Himself. The emphasis of holiness movements tends to be that God is producing specimens of holiness to put in His museum. If you accept this concept of personal holiness, your life’s determined purpose will not be for God, but for what you call “the evidence of God in your life”…. What shines forth and reveals God in your life is not your relative consistency to an idea of what a saint should be, but your genuine, living relationship with Jesus Christ, and your unrestrained devotion to Him whether you are well or sick… Christian perfection is not, and never can be, human perfection. Christian perfection is the perfection of a relationship with God that shows itself to be true even amid the seemingly unimportant aspects of human life… I am called to live in such a perfect relationship with God that my life produces a yearning for God in the lives of others, not admiration for myself…. Let Him do what He wants.”

          Perfection and the “Christian lifestyle” are the how’s, but in the modern day churches they are being preached without the why’s… Yes Jesus told us to be perfect as our Father in heaven is perfect, but I whole heartedly believe that we try to take that passage and shrink it down into a human, finite way, and apply is incompletely. This process is called religion, and yes, while I do believe that we are supposed to strive for excellence in all that we do, it is perfection that I think we need to cease dwelling on. It is God who perfects us by our willingness to let Him have control over our lives, not we, through our own abilities. And the why, in my opinion, is that by striving for perfection or excellence we are seeing God and His love for us in a much more real and passionate way. To live a life of rules, devoid of passion, is to neglect the beauty of having a real relation with our Abba Father!

Michael J. Fox said this, “Excellence, I can reach for; perfection is God’s business….”

          (I would hate to think that people would reject this profound truth just because of Fox’s political views.)

          On the opposite end we know that God is still a God of judgment and will be a God of judgment for the duration of our existence. Yes, in Malachi 1:2 God does say “‘I have loved you,’ says the Lord”, but in that same passage He speaks to those who sin knowingly and continually separate themselves from God’s will, answering their questions with the way to know Him. Those people who sin unabashedly are targets for a God who loves them enough to allow the consequences of sin to ruin them. It is by His grace that the righteous, but imperfect, are spared from significant pain in certain events, and those who turn their faces to Him will be made better for it.

          Here at Uriah Ministries I talk a lot about Uriah, one of my Bible heroes, but I rarely talk about his murderer. King David is a perfect example of this truth, where God’s judgment truly demonstrates God’s love at the same time!

          Nathan was prompted to rebuke David, in II Samuel 12:7-13 “Then Nathan said to David, “You are the man! This is what the LORD, the God of Israel, says: ‘I anointed you king over Israel, and I delivered you from the hand of Saul. I gave your master’s house to you, and your master’s wives into your arms. I gave you the house of Israel and Judah. And if all this had been too little, I would have given you even more. Why did you despise the word of the LORD by doing what is evil in his eyes? You struck down Uriah the Hittite with the sword and took his wife to be your own. You killed him with the sword of the Ammonites. Now, therefore, the sword will never depart from your house, because you despised me and took the wife of Uriah the Hittite to be your own.’ “This is what the LORD says: ‘Out of your own household I am going to bring calamity upon you. Before your very eyes I will take your wives and give them to one who is close to you, and he will lie with your wives in broad daylight. You did it in secret, but I will do this thing in broad daylight before all Israel.’ ” Then David said to Nathan, ‘I have sinned against the LORD.’”

          God was proving His love by His admonishment and punishment of David’s actions. In the end though, David was known as “a man after His own heart” and if you have read Psalm 51 you understand that his repentance was VERY sincere…

          So I ask you this… As we meet members from the “Emergent Church” and those that are part of the “fundy evangelical movement”, what side are we to choose? My answer? I am unable to clearly express through words what I need to say, and must only quote from a much better author than I…

          Philippians 2:12-13

          “Wherefore, my beloved, as ye have always obeyed, not as in my presence only, but now much more in my absence, work out your own salvation with fear and trembling. For it is God which worketh in you both to will and to do of his good pleasure.”

          It is not my job to change peoples’ minds, to engage in endless debates or struggles with people I disagree with, or to even entertain the comments made by those who are seemingly only about creating quarrels within the body of Christ. It is, however, my duty to spread the entire message of Christ to those that do not know Him, and to aid them in cultivating an authentic relationship with our beautifully authentic Father- a Father that loves us here and now, and has from before we were formed in our mother’s womb all the way into an eternal future. It is a message that includes the just judgment from a jealous God, but also the beautiful pursuits of a God that refers to us as the “bridegroom of Christ”, and that I believe wholeheartedly to be a balanced gospel.

Brennan Manning says this…

 

          In closing, I would like you all to know that I appreciate you reading from this blog as I learn and grow from day to day, and I pray that the messages that God has for me are thoughts that might aid you somehow in your lives. Uriah Ministries will be a haven for any and all, and I pray you are blessed as you finish this entirely too long blog! Also, the college ministry will be kicking off sometime early next year. I pray all of you will partner with me in harnessing the blessings of God, on a body that should be serving Him with their whole being.

Your Brother in the Fight,
Timothy Kurek

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~ by Tim Kurek on December 3, 2007.

22 Responses to “Confessions of a Ragamuffin”

  1. […] https://uriahministries.wordpress.com/2007/12/03/confessions-of-a-ragamuffin/ […]

  2. you know…there is very very little I disagree with in this blog. Very little indeed. If you said that stuff from a soapbox at a public venue you would be a great open air preacher!

    I do however think you underestimate the importance of fighting for truth. Yes we should preach the gospel of Jesus Christ, but we are also callled to rebuke.

    I am afraid that there are many wolves that hide among the umbrealla of the emergent church , and call themselves Christians when in fact they are apostate.

    It is our responsibilty to be a net to those who are fleeing the emergent herecies and a warning light for those who are still in the dark.

    Thatnks for this article and never stop fighting.

    Ps. Sure my grammar is bad…but I am writing this from my iPod touch. 🙂

  3. I would encourage you to also be balanced in saying there are a lot of people in the fundy evangelical side that need to be rebuked and spoken against too… It’s not just the Emergents that you need to worry about.

    Thanks for the comment.

    tim

  4. oh I never said I disagree with that. But my calling Is to call people from the depths of which I came.

  5. Tim,
    Your honesty took a lot of trust–trust in God and in your supporters. Grace to you! You’ve passed a major milestone in the journey.
    I’m glad you reminded us of the sins of omission: omitting the good we should do (as in James).
    Walking next to you, buddy. You’re in my prayers.
    Kristofer

  6. Tim, I was thinking about what you said.,..about being balanced.

    I do not see how being balanced is an issue? Nor do I see that as being biblical.

    By the standards you told me…

    RAVI Sacherius – Should focus Less on Apologetic’s and college campuses.

    Answers In Genesis – Should Focus less on Creation Science.

    XXChurch should focus less on Porn Addiction.

    We all have different roles. Were all different parts of the Body.

  7. Marcus,

    You are missing the entire point! The main message of the Bible is balance! God loves us, but we are to fear Him… Both are very true, but characterizing God by saying He is only loving, or only someone we should fear, is leaving out a huge part of what He is… Therefore what I am saying is, if you are going to preach God, preach all aspects of God. Your examples do not hold water… I have never heard Ravi Zacharias speak in an unbalanced way, and I have listened to over 40 of his messages and read three of his books. All of his words speak of God’s undeniable love. Read “The Lotus and the Cross” (an encounter between Guatama Buddha and Jesus). Ken Ham, and the creationists preach the science of the Bible, which includes neither side and is therefore balanced in itself. Porn addicts need to understand not only that porn is sin, but that God loves them and that “He is faithful and just to forgive us our sin and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” You see? All three of your examples are not applicable. Yes there are different aspects of the body, but all are balanced by a balanced book, a balanced message, and a balanced God. Thanks for commenting.

  8. Yes it is true bro. Tim that “we are we all share a common bond of weakness, for we are but dust, and all of us that struggle and act on the most common of temptations are equals in our undeservingness of hell and of fire, and of separation from the Father”

    and that’s why Master Lord Jesus Christ encourage us “Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in heaven is perfect.” Matthew 5:48

    When I try to compare myself and maybe you to our brother in muslim religion, buddhist monk, & conservative christian I can tell myself that I am nothing to these people in terms of sacrifice and strict observance of the righteous law. They pray 3 to 5 times a day and they have an enormous self-denial to the world.

    And I can feel hopeless on my salvation and that point of hopelessness something conceived in my mind.

    Master Lord Jesus, I’m not worthy of your holiness but I would rather save because of mercy than sacrifice.

    Because on salvation of mercy, We can feel your love.

    As you said “But go ye and learn what that meaneth, I will have mercy, and not sacrifice: for I am not come to call the righteous, but sinners to repentance.” Matthew 9:13

    do we and learn what that meaneth? How great is the power mercy?

    remember, a mother who loves her child share and give anything of what she have, even her life.

    can you charge glutony to a mother?, no
    can you teach her to sacrifice?, no

    because when you are at the state of mercy, you do sacrifice even you did not intent to do it.

    Because doing sacrifice by intention leads to boastfulness like the pharisees. (Luke 18:11 – 14)

    So,let mercy overcome sacrifice.

    “And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.” Matthew 25:40

  9. “It is not my job to change peoples’ minds, to engage in endless debates or struggles with people I disagree with, or to even entertain the comments made by those who are seemingly only about creating quarrels within the body of Christ”

    Yes you are true again brother Tim…

    “….., …., Master, we saw one PREACHING GOSPEL in thy name, and he IS NOT BELONG TO OUR CONGREGATION: AND WE CRITICIZE HIM, BECAUSE HE IS WRONG.” Mark 9:38

    “But Jesus said, HE IS NOT WRONG, for there is no man which shall PREACH GOSPEL in my name, that HAS NO lightly BELIEVE ON ME” Mark 9:39

    “ AND he that believeth on ME is not condemned: but he that believeth not is condemned already, because he hath not believed in the name of the only begotten Son of God.:.” John 3:18

    “HOWEVER if YOU CORRECTING thy brother PREACHER, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone in one or two more TIMES WITH THE RIGHTEOUSNESS OF THE SCRIPTURE: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother PREACHER. but if he neglect to hear YOU, PRAY HIM TO THE FATHER SO THAT HE WILL BE ENLIGHTEN”. ” Matthew 18:15, Matthew 18:16 & Matthew 5:44 combination

    But…..

    “Woe unto you, CHURCH LEADERS and PREACHERS, hypocrites! for ye ALWAYS DEBATING FOR WHO IS RIGHT AND WRONG WITH YOU, and OVERLOOK THE weightier matters of the law;

    Faith for persistence and hardwoking
    Mercy for sacrifice and love
    Justice for peace and obedient

    these ought ye to have done, and not to leave the other undone.(Matthew 23:23)

  10. I want to say it was Martin Luther, but this was spoken about a while back ago.

    Public Sins have to be dealt with Publicly and in the Open as the Sin was. Private Sins need to be dealt with Privately.

    Apostasy and Heresy are very public Sins and dilute a lot of people. It is foolish to go to a man with a Hardened HEart and deal with them, their message needs to be openly reproofed and rebuked. To let people who were corrupted by the message know as well.

  11. Is whoever said that God?

  12. “Apostasy and Heresy are very public Sins and dilute a lot of people. It is foolish to go to a man with a Hardened HEart and deal with them, their message needs to be openly reproofed and rebuked.”

    If you have a mercy to the salvation of the wrong preacher you think, then why you did not try the combination of (Matthew 18:15, Matthew 18:16 & Matthew 5:44 as posted previously)

    If you have a mercy to the salvation of the member of the wrong preacher you think, then why you did not try the combination of(Matthew 18:15, Matthew 18:16 & Matthew 5:44 as posted previously)

    remember, “… every good MOVE bringeth forth good RESULT; but a BAD MOVE bringeth forth evil RESULT. Matthew 7:17

    Therefore:

    those who plant or seed an insult will harvest an anger.
    those who plant or seed a respect will harvest obedient.
    those who plant or seed a wind will harvest a typhoon.
    those who plant or seed an anger will harvest a battle.

    Now, after rebuking in public of that wrong preacher as you think.

    can you assure me the salvation of his member and the conversion of the wrong preacher.

    if not? what do we get?

    remember we are judge by the following situation…

    “But he that knew not, and did commit things worthy of stripes, shall be beaten with few stripes. For unto whomsoever much is given, of him shall be much required: and to whom men have committed much, of him they will ask the more.” Luke 12:47

    MERCY! MERCY! MERCY!……….

    Did a loving mother insult her child publicly when it can commit wrong?

    Remember we are all brothers and sisters and only Master Lord Jesus Christ can rebuke our doings. (sounds authority)

  13. Eyes… I just need to say that I do not understand anything you ever write… Not saying this to be mean, but it makes no sense to people who speak English. I appreciate the time you spend writing your responses and I appreciate you reading my blogs, but I just think you should keep your messages very simple.. God bless.

    tim

  14. I understand you brother Tim, but sorry if I will not ask for your consideration about my grammar.

    Because I believe that it is your priveleges as a people who speak English to hear those people who does not speak English but trying to speak english.

    and regarding about ego? well, its my privileges to be here….

    God bless…

  15. I am not insulting you bro, I am just saying that it is hard for me to understand what you are saying because English is not your first language. If English wasn’t my first language I doubt I would speak or write it as well as you, so be proud of yourself for that fact, but I am just saying it is hard. No offense intended…

    tim

  16. To Tim kurek:
    PROVERBS 1:23″IF YOU TURN AT MY REPROOF, BEHOLD, I WILL POUR OUT MY SPIRIT TO YOU; I WILL MAKE MY WORDS KNOWN TO YOU”.
    i don’t understand why you said “it is hard for you to understand what you are saying because English is not your language”.
    when what he said is all from the bible? just read the verses given…or it means… “GOD IS SPEAKING THE TRUTH”

  17. WHAT? WE CAN’T UNDERSTAND WHY YOU ARE REFERENCING THEM BECAUSE YOU SPEAK IN SUCH A WAY NO ONE CAN UNDERSTAND… SEE the comment by the Anonymous guy on my last blog and you will understand how you come off…

    Tim

  18. You can’t understand because you don’t want to understand.

    “The rich man’s wealth is his strong city, and as an high wall in his own conceit”. Prv:18:11:

    In actual interpretation based in our situation;

    “The social standing of YOU brother TIM is high, as high as your ego” Prv:18:11:

    can you understand now?

    EYES

  19. Psalm 62, God is my defense and I shall not be moved. I was dismayed by your ignorant and hurtful message that was sent as a result of me saying that your english is so poor I do not know how to read what you are saying about why you use those verses. And I was hurt knowing that I had been very nice in clearly expressing understanding that English is your second language. Trying to call me out with Provers 18:11 was something I know you will answer for to God though so I won’t even worry about it. I will only say this… I love you. I love you, and God loves you, and He has total grace on us when we falter in our walks. And as your brother in Christ I love you and am praying for you daily. Praise God for being so great!

    Timothy Kurek

  20. Hi there, Tim.

    I like JoJo and EYES. They’re funny, like a little person. They seem to have so much to offer as far as running commentary but, sadly, EYES makes little sense when combined with his/her (very) basic grasp of the English language. Jojo’s few comments have been easily understood, and no one can deny that.

    JoJo, I applaud you for your dedication to making sense. Clearly, you and EYES need to download AOL Instant Messenger and have a class. EYES makes little sense in what he/she SAYS, not saying that we don’t get the verses he/she QUOTES. We’re more confused as to exactly what he or she is trying to connect it to when he/she throws Bible verses together with half sentences that would make a frontal lobotamy patient correct him/her. It reminds me of Balaam and the talking donkey. Yeah, it’s definitely like a talking jackass. Good analogy on my part.

    I don’t speak for Tim. I don’t speak for God. I don’t speak for Christians. I speak for me. Personally, I see the same garbage being tossed back and forth that makes me sick of Christianity. Too many prideful blowhards spouting off Scriptures in an attempt to “outdo” each other spiritually. I’ve sat back and watched as people have been nice and as people have steadily gotten more sharp. So, here’s my take.

    JoJo, it’s not your place to try to challenge Tim about his conversations with EYES unless you are EYES. Regardless of what you quote back at me (and I’m sure you will) it doesn’t concern you. Let them work out their misunderstanding together without more outside influence unless you truly are EYES.

    EYES, we get it. You’re anxious to drop a comment on EVERYTHING that Tim says. I’m sure he appreciates it. All we ask is that you try to be a little more clear in what you’re trying to communicate. I’ve read your comments many times over. I’M LOST TOO! It’s not because “Mr. Tim” is an egotistical, rich man. It’s because there IS a language barrier. Deal with it. You come off like a foreigner to us Americans because you ARE a foreigner to us Americans. It’s OK. It’s not a problem. We just have to work harder to overcome that issue.

    Man, people! We just need patience. Stop the bickering and try to understand each other. Christ desired that we be one, just like He and the Father. Tim obviously wants to understand or he wouldn’t have approved your comments. He could just say, “These people are not making sense. I don’t need the clutter on my blog.”

    But he didn’t.

    He’s making the attempt. That’s more than I would do.

    Good job, Tim.

    I support what you’re trying to accomplish here, despite the “Pharisees of the Philippines” who try to correct, chastise, and influence with no clear reasoning. Allow me to remind any who are reading this, the Enemy knows the Scriptures, too. The real mark of the true minister is when he can combine what HE says to what the WORD says. Like I said, I think there is simply a LANGUAGE barrier here. It doesn’t mean anything more than that.

    But I think that those who are making it a “who’s the real prophet” contest are the children of dissension. I won’t back down from that stance until THEY prove me wrong by their words and actions.

    We’ll see what develops.

    Micah 6:8

  21. Thank you Josh, I appreciate your words, support, and your encouragement… I really hope and pray I do not have to deal with 100 more comments with a bunch of random Bible verses strung together with no understandable explanation. Thanks again!

    Tim Kurek

  22. Brother Tim and Brother Josh sorry for the misconception and misunderstanding.

    Actually were just doing was it written in the heading of this blog..

    uriah ministries — Thoughts on Christian brotherhood

    a thoughts can be clear, can be blurred, can be abstract, can be concrete,can be long, can be short, can be little, can be more or any.

    brotherhood is unrestricted it can be white, black, yellow, brown or any again.

    in short the spirit of freedom is in here.

    “And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.” John 8:32

    Brother Tim, I salute you…

    YOUR LOVES, CONQUER ME.

    God Bless.

    EYES

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