Silence

          None could say that my life is filled with some spectacular excitement, or even some above average drama- save a few weird relationships- but for some reason lately I have been on an adventure. I am trapped within a struggle that I can not define with words or pictures, rather it is some unknown titan that  stands before me daring me to fight. The funny thing is, no amount of support from friends or family is able to pacify the beast, and no matter how much I sleep my spirit seems to be constantly drained. I don’t remember the last time that I wasn’t physically, emotionally, or spiritually tired. I don’t even remotely know what is happening to me, but I am at peace.

          The past few weeks have been beautifully silent. No phone, no Internet, and no way to really get a hold of me has made it very easy to disappear into the darkness and to relax until the moment I choose to re-enter the world I have crafted for myself. Escape, silence, time… All have shown me how “plugged in” I really am to this chaotic matrix that is worse than a nightmare. I have purposely not gotten a new phone now for 2 weeks… Any who know me understands how crazy that is, but I have found that while my phone was a major convenience, losing it when I did was the biggest blessing I could have been given before I headed into this spiritual turbulence.

          So here is all that I can offer in this blog…

          In the silence, the intimacy with you and God can be so much more powerful. Take some time this week, if you care to, turn off the cell and the Internet, and listen. You never know what you might hear.

~ by Tim Kurek on July 1, 2008.